I Am No Longer A Human Thermostat!!

7 Oct

This one is long, but a testimony of my most recent conviction.

This “Popeye, Living Life Strong” series at church started off so amazing this past weekend. I learned so much about God’s peace & how it differs from the world’s peace. I knew that it did, but Pastor Micah really broke down John 14:27 to explain everything Jesus was explaining in that one little verse. I’m always so amazed at how much can be obtained from just one verse of the bible. I took more notes than I have in a long time. Such a blessing for my growth! That isn’t, however, the core of this blog, but since it did derive from Pastor Micah’s teaching…

Pastor Micah was talking about what our “spinach” is in life & what our “Brutis” is. He talked about how sometimes we are our own worst enemy & are quick to give the devil credit for our hang-ups. Sooo true. I’m definitely guilty of that. Then he went on to talk about how we instinctively pull away when we start to exceed our own expectations of ourselves… “we’re like human thermometers”. He talked about pursuing the dream that God has impressed on our hearts, & NOT pulling back when we exceed our expectations of fulfilling that dream. Here is where the purpose of the blog comes in…

A dream that God has impressed on our hearts. For some reason, this has been something that I’ve struggled to discover. For a long time, I’ve been looking for “the dream” that God has put on my heart. Am I supposed to write a book someday, or own my own business, or volunteer in some area to change lives?

P. Micah very non-chalantly mentioned that your dream may not be, “what you are going to do, but simply, WHO you are going to become. Maybe He has put the dream of loving your husband & being devoted to him for the rest of your life. & becoming a mother that’s devoted to her children & teaching them the love that Christ has for them & their value” (I paraphrased a little). It was like a brick hit me in the face at that moment. My definition of “a dream” was so narrow. God impressed this exact thing on my heart about 6 years ago. I was heading in the complete opposite direction from this dream & yet, even though I wasn’t following God at the time, He absolutely impressed on my heart that this is what I’m called to fulfill. If I never achieve another thing… this is my dream.

Of course, then he went on to describe our thermostat behavior & how when we start to exceed our expectations of where we are supposed to be at this point in the game in pursuing this dream (i.e. – we suddenly make broad leaps at achieving it, instead of small steps), we tend to back off. We tend to get scared that we won’t live up to what God requires for us to achieve. I have done that. I get scared that I am too selfish or unable to live up to what it takes to be what God has impressed on my heart, so I start to sabotage my progress… I think negative thoughts, which in turn, affect my pure, beautiful, & TRUE reality of my marriage & the fact that I AM a good mother & try a little harder everyday. It’s a damaging & hurtful process for me. I can’t tell the world how relieving it is to finally identify why I do that! It’s hard to keep from making the same mistakes when you haven’t any idea what causes them. This one statement that P. Micah so non-chalantly mentioned, has changed how I react to my ownself forever. This was a huge blessing… HUGE… & a major lesson learned. Now I can identify this particular hang up & confront it head on. I am no longer a human thermostat!

John 14:27 – Peace I leave with you; My [own] peace I now give and bequeath to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. [Stop allowing yourselves to be agitated and disturbed; and do not permit yourselves to be fearful and intimidated and cowardly and unsettled.]

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