A Recap & A Revelation

For journaling purposes, I thought it smart to sort of record some of the accomplishments & manifestations of 2011, & to also record some of the things I began 2012 fasting & believing for…

2011:

A strong & blessed year for us indeed.

1. Keely finished treatment in July of this year. 6 months out & I can’t think of anything more beautiful to see than the true manifestation of a healing that we have prayed & believed for for 2 & 1/2 years. Everyday I notice it! Not a day goes by that I don’t look at her & say, “look at her… so full of energy, so healthy & vibrant. God you are true!”

2. I welcomed a new decade into my life in the best shape of my life. Huge accomplishment!

3. After over a year of praying & searching for a church home (& even being at a church for almost a year & knowing in our spirit that it wasn’t where we were supposed to be), God finally ushered us into a place that is home!… a place that fosters the fullness of Christ, that is warm & welcoming, that is Spirit-led, & where we can best serve & impact the body!

4. In 2010, the Lord began to impress some detailed & strong convictions for our family onto our hearts. The vision we began to receive in a broader spectrum in 2009 was starting to take on a real form. In 2011, we gained more ground & more wisdom in this area. I love our vision. I love seeing ourselves foster that vision & staying focused in the midst of daily life. We certainly don’t do everything right, but we are headed somewhere amazing!

2012:

The Lord began to stir up in me in the weeks prior to this year approaching, that this is going to be a dynamic year for us!

1. I am strongly convinced that this will be a year of broken chains. Chains that are holding me back from the fullness of what God’s desire is for me. As I was fasting… the Lord put a song in my heart to confirm what He was telling me… “Chains be broken. Lives be healed. Eyes be opened. Christ is revealed”. Haven’t heard that song in a long, long time, & yet, there it sat in my heart ready to be given life by Him & ready to come out of my mouth with praise.

2. We are moving in a couple of weeks. The story behind how we came into this house is just crazy in itself. There is no other explanation for the most random & unusual sequence of events coming together to form into a blessing that we’ve been praying for, than God Himself. Only God can place things like this into order! We received everything on our “list” of wants… even down to the small, “we can totally do without” things like, ranch style (no more 2 stories!). Praying that this year is the beginning of enjoying & thriving in the blessings & joy that was already prepared for us by the One that goes before us… good health & wide open spaces.

3. Praying that we can really form our roots in our church & serve the body.

4. Praying for vision for 2012 specifically. Vision for myself & my family. We are meant for greatness!… how can we work towards that this year?

5. Praying to be slower to anger, more merciful & loving, & more calm & peaceful toward my children.

6. One of the #1 things I would like to work on in terms of my inner, heart issues is to “Always try to see people for who they can become”. I want these words written on my heart so that they become my natural habit. I’m seriously considering getting up every day of 2012 & writing this on my hand so that at the years end, it is something that is so natural to me that I don’t even have to think about it before I just do it.

I would love to hear what other people are praying for for 2012! What are your goals, dreams, hopes, & visions for the new year?

No such thing as Santa?!!!!

As Christmas draws near & our kids get that infamous question from family members & strangers alike, “What is Santa bringing you for Christmas?”… I thought it necessary to do some ‘splainin’.

In our house, we don’t do Santa. We have personal convictions on the issue. First, let me say that I don’t think negatively of any parent that chooses to include Santa into their Christmas tradition. I hope that we can be given the same regard. & here is why we choose not to incorporate Santa:

Reason #1- Originally, we actually sold the story of Santa to our kids (well, Keely). Although, we were already beginning to feel a tug on our hearts to go in a different direction with our family. Still, we wanted our kids to have the “fantasy”. Until, one day, a very grown up 4 year old (cancer tends to do that to a kid) asked, “mom, if Santa takes toys to everyone, why do we need to buy toys for poor kids?”. That was the final tug… that last opportunity I needed from the Lord to be obedient with what He had been laying on my heart.

Reason #2- Keely has been through a lot more than typical kids her age. Many parents don’t know how important it is to have a trusting relationship with their young child. We never wanted to lie to Keely due to medical reasons. If she were facing a painful procedure, we would have never told her, “this won’t hurt”. Trust is damaged at that point. As her parents, we became her safe haven. We wanted her to know that we would never lie to her in order to comfort her in the moment. We would tell her the truth & promise to be with her & encourage her to pray with us for God to be with her.

Reason # 3 (the greatest reason!)- Jesus. I never used think that incorporating the fantasy of Santa did much damage to the reality of Jesus. God kept showing me how it did, however. Little revelations came to me periodically. Little revelations like these:

You can’t see Santa, but we’re encouraged to “just believe”. Isn’t that how we teach our children about Jesus (this one hit me hard as I heard them singing one day “He sees you when you’re sleeping. He knows when you’re awake”. Huge check in my spirit! I had to let them know that singing the song was okay as long as they understood that no one has that ability except their Father)?….

When Santa is in the mix, how can we realistically expect a young child to focus on Christ? Only one mystical creature at a time please….

Why would I want Santa taking the credit when we struggle to give to our children? When my husband is working a second job for 2 months leading up to Christmas just so that we can put gifts under the tree for 3 kids. I want our children to understand & appreciate what they are given because they have seen their parents work hard to give to them out of love & because they have sacrificed time with their daddy for these gifts. Too many children have a sense of entitlement. This helps teach appreciation, & the value of hard work & sacrifice early on. It also begins to lay the foundation for the sacrifices that were made by so many for the birth- the death & resurrection of Christ.

I do not believe that we are robbing them of “fantasy” by taking Santa out of our Christmas celebration. We do so much throughout the year that encourages imagination & fantasy. Our kids are very healthy in this area… & I love that! I was a dreamer & “fantasy” kid myself & I think it is one of the things that fostered my creativity. I don’t think Santa had anything to do with that. & our children are just as excited about Christmas as all other children!

So there you have it. No more dirty looks from strangers when our kids politely respond that “there is no such thing as Santa” & no more lectures from family about how we are “ridiculous”. These are our convictions & we feel good about them. Mostly though, we are being obedient to the Holy Spirits beckon on our hearts & that is all that matters.

Chaos. Stop. Take in the beauty.

That moment in the middle of my choatic, busy life… when no one is watching & all is quiet, & I can just stop, admire her & take in the blessing & the simplicity of this scene. She is my little piece of beauty, peace, & sunshine

 

9/28/2011

Funny…. he drives me the most crazy (age & phase induced, I’m sure), yet he’s the focus of my “memory moments”….

He may be a small fry, but he put the seat on, pulled down his britches, & climbed up there all by himself while I was cooking. Here is his “daddy! I go pee!” face

& here he is “teaching”. He got his pencil out & used it as a pointer just like mommy does

 

As I pray daily for the blossoming of their friendship….

…. I see it manifesting right in front of my eyes

It’s something that I desire deeply for them as they grow… to know the value of a sibling, to always be an active part of one another’s life, to have a forever best friend through life… someone who has walked with them all of their life… who knows their past & believes in where they’re going. To truly treasure the blessing of having siblings.

I absolutely LOVE this picture. Here we are making their favorite cookies for “C” week. This is proving to be a fun year of school!

and here’s my moment… (playing catch-up again)

Truth is… she’s the best big sister a little boy could ever ask for *^_^*   He can’t quite push himself, so she drops what she’s doing to help him get in a few laps.

“Finley, come get in the bath. Finley??…. Where’s Finley?”….

Here are a couple of pictures from our birthday party preparations….

Finley, my “helper” taking care of the access powdered sugar while I whip up the icing for the cupcakes.

Keely & I playing in the party supply store…. (lotsa giggles!)

 

…. & the birthday party

*^_^*   Lovebugs

Happy 4th Birthday Optimus Prime

 

Philippians 4:7

Philippians 4:7 “and the peace of God, which surpasses (transcends) all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”

We’ve all heard that famous piece of God’s Word. Most of us have prayed it over someone. But I’m sure, many of us, like myself, can’t fully grasp it.

Keely had her final bone marrow aspiration & spinal tap this past Friday. NOW is when the measure of our faith is really tested. Treatment is done… now we will see what her body does now that there are no meds being administered to keep the cancer away. For almost EVERY family, this is the time of most anxiety & fear. In the weeks leading up, I had this horrible feeling in my stomach. I felt uneasy, worried… all of those things that make no difference in our situation, that stand outside of what faith says, & that we have clearly been instructed to avoid. I decided to fast. What rewards that brings!!

Over the next week, I realized how at peace I felt. Even those “what if” thoughts had no effect on me. That’s peace that comes supernaturally! We are still waiting on the results from the bone marrow & I don’t even feel on edge about it. I know the results. & I know what the results will be every time.

As I was basking in this peace & giving thanks to my magnificent, gracious, & loving God, He impressed Philippians 4:7 on my heart…

Our natural minds say that it makes no sense to have such peace during what should be the most anxious time, yet, I do. God softly whispered, “that’s what ‘surpasses all understanding’ means. I told you that I would give you peace that you might not understand. & that I would guard your hearts & minds through Christ Jesus. Not even your own negative thoughts can penetrate that peace in your mind that was set forth when He said “it is finished”… because through & because of Him, your heart & mind is guarded.”

I pray that you can not only come to fully grasp what it means to not even understand the peace that God has already placed in your hearts & minds, but to EXPERIENCE it & rest in it.

The Lost Sheep

As a church, do we show as much commitment & concern to the existing “body” as we do the salvation of unbelievers? Don’t get me wrong, it is my goal to share the gospel & be a witness of Christ!… but something was brought to my attention by a friend who is a long time Christian & is facing difficulty in her walk, that has really been stirring in my heart. If we rescue the “lost” & lead them to redemption, what happens when they stumble? Do we then say, we lead you to salvation, now you’re on your own? Everyone, Christian or not, understands that everyone will periodically have a need that needs met at certain points throughout life, a struggle (whether it’s a physical one, inner struggle, financial, etc.). As a church, are our eyes open to caring for the existing body as well as the “lost”? Are our eyes & hearts open to the needs within the body?

We use the parable of the Lost Sheep to refer to Heaven’s concern to rescue the 1 sinner as opposed to the 99 who are good with God at the moment. But can a Believer also become “lost” & have that same need to be rescued or helped? If a person in the body suddenly isn’t a familiar face anymore, who cares enough to call them & say, “everything good with you, girl? You’ve been on my mind. Where you been?” Or do we just move along with church agendas & reeling people into BECOMING a part of the body. What about the people who already are?… the people who have served God & the church… who have been a blessing to their brothers & sisters… who have a heart for God, but have just hit a bump in the road? Are we as diligent to rescue them… to BE their FAMILY as God has called us to be?!

The only way people are really going to want to be a part of the church, as opposed to some random social group, is by the evidence of the love that flows throughout the individuals within that church. Are we representing that?… & not just toward newcomers or people who are “good with God” right now & in church everytime the doors open. Discipleship is a broad calling. Are we placing all of the focus in meeting the need & ministering to the hearts of one specific group of people? It’s easy to love someone when they are serving in the church regularly, there everytime the doors open, a smile on their face (cause everything is good), etc…. but what about when that same person disappears or tapers off? Or makes some wrong turns?… did we love them only because they served or were simply easy to love in that time of “being good with God”? Or because we considered them as “spiritual” as ourselves? Or do we actually invest real time & energy in loving them, even when it’s difficult? Do we call them regularly to ask to join them in prayer or encourage them? Do we bring a meal (& not just when they have a baby!)? Do we help them financially? (Eph 4:2 -”Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love“). It’s something to examine!

It doesn’t begin & end with ”we helped you to find Christ”. It should be, “We helped you find Christ & now we are indebted to loving you & fostering that walk from now until eternity!”

As a church, are we missing something?

1 Peter 1:22 – “Since you have purified your souls in obeying the truth through the Spirit in sincere love of the brethren, love one another FERVENTLY with a pure heart”

1 John 3:16-18- “This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.

Galatians 6:2 – “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ”

Today’s Moment:

Picking out books for story time….

“Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I drive by
again?”

Too hot for a picnic… outside, anyway

Teaching him to read with her “Read Aloud Bible”. Moments I’ll treasure for-ever!

Luke 12:48

….. “ When someone has been given much, much will be required in return; and when someone has been entrusted with much, even more will be required.”

Funny how when God is teaching you something… it just keeps coming up… over & over in a relatively short period of time. This particular lesson has challenged me many times in several different areas over the last month.

I randomly heard Tracy Chapman’s ‘Fast Car’ the other day. It’s been a while since I’ve heard a song that triggered a memory. For a brief moment, I remembered listening to that song as a pre-teen… feeling like I related to the lyrics so much (most of them, anyway). At an early age, I knew I wanted more. I wanted someone to rescue me & take me out of a simple town, a simple life, a simple mind. At 19, with no car & no real plans, I moved to a new city. 70 miles isn’t far, but it was an eternity away from everything I knew. I was suddenly in an environment that required more ambition, more education, more wit, real goals… & I felt motivated to engage my own desires for “more”. I started to see my vision of being more than what I was born into, as a reality. [Don't get me wrong, I LOVE the humility & simplicity of my family. I am grateful for that being my beginning. I don't know that I would possess those things if I weren't raised in them.] Understand that these “goals”, this ” ambition” for me, is quite different from those of the people around me. It wasn’t the goal of success in a career… but the drive to be more as a person, know more, have more passion, read more, expect more (from myself, from a spouse, from every day life). This was born inside of me apparently, since I can remember feeling this way before I even knew what that looked like or how it was defined as I do now.

Which brings me to 2007. I was moved by the Holy Spirit & accepted Christ into my heart. My whole life changed. All of that motivation, ambition, goals, passion was focused on Him… this life. I love reflection. Without quiet reflections, it’s impossible to see how God PERFECTLY orchestrated everything in your life. Everything came at exactly the right time… every lesson, every decision made, every move, every trial, every word given from Him, every placement, every person, everything! It was all put in place to build something, to strengthen, to prepare, to mature…

Over the last few years, I have learned so much about so many different things. God has taught me so much & led me to so much knowledge. As I reflect on what I’ve learned in such a short amount of time in my adult life, I am so grateful (Hosea 4:6). That being said…. God has been impressing Luke 12:48 on me lately. No excuses. No excuses not to eat the right foods & avoid toxins, no excuses not to be a conqueror, no excuses not to read one more book this year, no excuses not to excercise, no excuses not to raise my children REALLY experiencing God daily, no excuses not to be a blessing, no excuses not to serve my husband, no excuses not to homeschool, no excuses not to tithe, no excuses not to live life with direct purpose, no excuses not to pursue God with a reckless abandon… because, to whom much is given, much is expected……..  Maybe being simple-minded isn’t so bad. haha.